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Right now something in my life is feeling a bit off. It’s not the end of the world or irrecoverable. It’s not mega disaster or anything. But it feels off. You know what I mean? Off-ness is sure offputting, isn’t it. Even if most everything in our life is cruising, the one thing that isn’t will take up our energy. The one thing that’s off outshines all that’s on.

 

Your job is off.

Your body is off.

Your spouse is off.

Your kid is off.

Your mind is off.

Your trust is off.

Your self-worth is off.

Your marriage is off.

Your bank account is off.

Your family member is off.

Your dog is off.

 

That one thing begins to loom. We feel the discomfort of having to discern the repair-work. Do we push? Do we wait? Do we speak up? Do we hush up? Do we let go? Do we hold on? Do we dig in? Do we allow space?

 

Hard to know.

 

I’ve written and erased quite a few paragraphs at this point in the post because if there are no easy answers for me, then I’m sure there are no easy answers for you.

 

I guess what makes sense to me right now is to be brave—to lean into the hard places with courage—and to also save some space for God to do his mysterious work.

 

I look at the artwork in the picture at the beginning of this post. It’s such a perfect metaphor. Sometimes our brave is covered over, muted a bit, challenged, even disguised, and we need to do the hard work of freeing it from the layers and layers that are burying it. Excavating our brave is holy work.

 

In the midst of it all, as I’m leaning in and also asking God to show up for me, I can be good to myself. {It’s always brave to take care of ourselves, especially in the midst of anything off.} Find the spacious place, the breathing room. Find beauty. Feed myself well. Rest. Enjoy the College World Series, the World Cup, Sex and the City reruns, chick lit novels. Drink water.

 

If one big thing or one little thing—no matter how big or how small—is feeling off (unresolved, tense, disappointing, unclear), I just wanted to encourage you to be brave {whatever that means for you} and, also, to leave some space for God to surprise you.

 

With love to you today,

Leeana

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